Any hot sugar daddies follow me? Poor student looking to make some money by doing absolutely nothing except look cute

marshmalllow:

Average height boys r suspicious to me…..always so medium….probably hiding something. and short boys always so angry about being short. and tall boys r too scary and more mass volume to store evil. there is no peace

miumiu94:

I need to be the hottest person at the grocery store

official-daft-punk:

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

frigerator:

i feel bad for adults on disney channel like i feel like they wanted successful acting careers but they couldn’t get any gigs and had to settle for being the bald dad or the hot mom on a show for kids